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04/13/2025


i had my face-rippy-off surgery a little over two weeks ago now. it was cool i think, i wasn't really awake for it. i was under anesthesia dreaming about akatsuki combos for some reason (i do not play this character)? recovery has been going very well, i'd say. between not having super aggressive work done and being very well taken care of during recovery (i'm so unbelievably lucky and thankful, i cannot overstate this), things have been moving along faster than expected, which is very nice. i'm still a little fucked up looking, but that's just how this goes. i went from looking like i lost a fight really badly, to some kind of weird chipmunk thing, to being chubby-cheeked in a way that kinda makes me look like a weird baby or something.


that motherfucker forgot to put a flower on my head.

03/21/2025

one year has come and excelled poorly


with the exception of that post i made and deleted about my yurijam game (still viewable on post archive page), i've hardly touched this site in like a year. what the hell have i been up to? have i been toiling away on sneeders? recording that EP that's been half-written since 2021? some secret third thing?

no lmao


no one asked any of those questions, but i've been doing nothing.

okay i have been doing something, but it's felt like nothing, since the whole process has mostly comprised of waiting and dealing with bureaucratic gatekeepy shit. i'm getting that surgery where they peel off your face and grind your skull to dust and stick it back on. it's less than a week away. i told my surgeon to give me a lil flower that grows out of my head while he's at it, but he's probably gonna forget. and then after all that, i'm gonna keep doing nothing because i need to grind at my job a little longer for *another* surgery before i get the hell out of there. i hate insurance.

but getting all of that out of the way and quitting my job won't magically instill me with some feeling of purpose or whatever. i'll probably end up feeling even more directionless than before. being preoccupied with all of this has been a very convenient excuse for doing fucking nothing with my time.


me typing all this shit ^

09/20/2024

I'm entering Yurijam 2024


[EDIT 03/21/2025] : i very much did not finish this game. i'll likely pick it back up for yurijam next year. shit you not, I didn't finish it because I started taking cypro during the time I was working on it and became totally disinterested in the idea of making an eroge.

maybe once i start working on it again, i'll take progesterone to help things along lol. anyways, back to the the post as it was originally written:

my entry, titled lilyfantasia, is a shitty terrible eroge vn with icky transbian elf sex and also it's kind of a final fantasy fangame in an obtuse way (like, it's final fantasy in the same way that a lot of fantasy settings are based on DnD or lord of the rings or wizardry or w/e). it follows enid, half-elf and knight attendant to lady hilda siegfrid, human arcanist and heiress of a powerful noble family with ties to the monarchist government.


look, it's them! ^

there likely won't be much to it other than the self-indulgent smut angle, but I've never made something like this before, and I'm not exactly a strong writer anyway. so yeah it's definitely helpful that i'm not exactly aspiring to much with this lol. maybe i'll actually even finish it :v

03/29/2024

now that i've made this site centered around the media i consume and enjoy, i'm realizing i don't really like talking about media that much but just kinda end up doing it a lot anyway because i don't go outside and therefore don't have much else to talk about.

03/26/2024

lmao wow i'm in website no wayyyyy dude